USEFULNESS VS VALUE
“value is subjective and toxic. usefulness is objective and attracts love.”
The Lesson
When people talk about 'value'-feeling worthless, feeling better than others. They're trapped in a toxic frame. Value is purely subjective; no one agrees on it, and thinking about it leads to misery. Reframe: think in terms of usefulness instead. Are you helping someone? Good at your job? Making others better off? Usefulness is objective-people agree on what's useful. And when you're consistently useful to others, the outcome is love. People fall in love with those who benefit them. Build your life around being useful, not around subjective value judgments.
Real-World Example
A founder spirals into 'Am I valuable enough? Does the market think I'm worth funding?' Toxic frame, constant anxiety. They reframe to usefulness: 'Am I being useful to my team? My customers? My investors?' Yes. They're solving real problems. The anxiety fades. They focus on being more useful, which attracts better talent, more customers, more investors. Love follows usefulness.
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